Sudden Thoughts of Him

Fables and myths suddenly awashed me
Stories of which you animatedly shared to me
Then...
I sat and listened attentively with your stories.

Stories of your travels and your experiences from each
Never ceased to mesmerize me
Then...
I dreamed to become a traveller just like who you were.

Unplanned travels within the country
And joyrides on your motorcyle
Then...
And until now still remain the best adventure of my lifetime.

The giggles I used to get from your tickles
And the little gifts that surprised me during your visits
Then...
How I always looked forward to your every visit.

The beauty of education
And the value of respect to parents
Then...
I embedded it into my heart, where until now it still reside.

I am running out of words to say about him. It has been more than a month since his birthday and, still, I'm not yet done with my writing about him, a supposedly my one way of celebrating his birthday. It's difficult to push down every letter in the keyboard because every pounce of letter is a slit in the wound that I thought never existed. And it's difficult to proceed to another paragraph when every thought of him (sweet memories with him) breaks the bondage of frigidness.

I still have lots of beautiful stories about him. How he never gets tired of travelling and how he is so passionate in his researches and writings. How funny his smirks sounded and how the smell of his cigarrettes used to overwhelm the entire living room.

I wanted to believe that I am my father's daughter, yet, there are instances that I do not want to. I still have lots of questions which I know that can never be answered. Where silence of understanding is the best relief I can give to myself...longings and needs that were never answered surpassed the cute fables and the motorcycle adventures.

I still hope we will see each other again while it is still can be done. As of now, I just never thought that I am who I am until this writing. I never thought that this sudden occurence of thoughts about him make me realize that I miss my father, afterall.

Belated Happy Birthday Daddy!